When a friend is preparing for something really huge in their life, something they have always dreamt of, I am the first one to support them. But when it comes to celebrating who I am, it’s something that doesn’t come naturally and effortlessly. I frequently engage in the “I’ll be happy until…” game (you know, the one where you believe you don’t deserve to give yourself a high five until you get that ideal job, lose the weight you want to lose, save money for a down payment, or meet “the one”?). Sounds recognizable? 

So how can we alter our perspective and begin to appreciate who we are right now? Here comes Mel Robbins–she has a long list of roles under her belt, including motivational speaker, best-selling author, former TV host and criminal defense attorney, mother, and wife. According to Robbins, the “High 5 Habit,” can change your perspective and outlook to level up. So I made the decision to read the bestseller and give it a shot. Warning: It changed my life.

According to her, including the “High 5 Habit” into your morning routine can not only change your connection with yourself but also foster self-assurance, motivation, and happiness. Continue reading to learn about my experience implementing what Robbins calls a “High 5 Morning,” which consists of six stages that can help you prepare for the day by putting yourself first.

1. Wake Up When The Alarm Rings

We all have been there, but no snoozing is allowed. Robbins believes ‘ When you hit the snooze button your body thinks that you don’t do what you decide you are going to do that affects how the Reticular Activating System (RAS) controls what information is retained in the brain and eliminated. Setting your alarm at night is a promise you make to yourself, and getting up on time is a fulfillment of that promise.

Even though it was challenging to ignore the “just five more minutes” mantra in my head and get out of bed without checking my phone, after the first day I already felt more relaxed and productive. It seemed as though I had more time in the day to complete tasks that I otherwise wouldn’t have had time for.

2. Try A Self-Love Affirmation  

Start by placing your hands on your chest, “I’m okay, I’m safe, I’m loved,” this helps to reduce daily stress and boost overall self-love. She also added that repeating this affirmation helps you find your core, unwind your body, and boost your confidence. Even though it may seem corny, putting your hands over your heart can actually encourage better judgment and behavior, according to a Polish study.

My perception regarding everything changed, and I could see things more clearly after just a few days of practicing this. It served as a reminder that I am secure, I am worthy of love, and my concerns are unfounded. Without a doubt, I’m adding this habit to my collection of self-esteem boosters.

3. Make Your Bed

Making your bed each morning is a further approach to developing self-discipline and dedication. What may appear to be a simple task has many advantages: according to several studies, it elevates your mood and boosts productivity. My mood completely changes as I enter my bedroom. You can call me a neat freak if you like, but science indicates it makes a difference when the bed is made. No matter where you are, how you’re feeling, or what justifications you may have, Robbins advised, “the secret to putting yourself first is executing what you said you would do.”

4. High-Five Your Reflection

Robbins stated that you should always “greet your biggest ally and best friend—you.” The most important habit, according to Robbins, is high-fiving your mirror, but for me, it was the most difficult to develop. I was so used to just seeing my shortcomings when I looked in the mirror (and it felt so uncomfortable?). But as I got used to giving my mirror high fives, I couldn’t help but smile and tell myself, “I got this. The day is going to be fantastic. It was like giving myself a pep talk every morning to put the habit into practice.

5. Lay Out Your Workout Clothes The Night Before

We all understand the advantages of working out for our bodies and minds, but it can be challenging to actually do it. Robbins sets out her training attire the night before, which makes her feel “productive guilt” and makes her put them on first thing in the morning. This is definitely not new or revolutionary, but it allowed me to enjoy every victory, even the little act of putting on exercise clothes (whether or not I actually worked out that day).

6. Journal 

To help you manifest your happiest existence and also gain awareness of what you need, Robbins encourages “dreaming in the morning”. In order to be present and process your emotions, grab your journal and write down everything you’re feeling (both good and bad). Write down five goals you have after that (it can be anything, from finding love to exploring Kerala). You validate your dreams by putting them on paper. Giving yourself permission to dream large and to seek what appears impossible is essential to living a High 5 Life, she said.“Dreaming in the morning” was the easiest for me to adapt and I started feeling more grounded and clear as I included this final step in my morning ritual. Making a note of my feelings and thoughts prevented them from bothering and influencing me throughout the day. Seeing my goals written out made them appear more real and doable, so I was able to move past my negative thinking and make room for new optimistic beliefs. 

I give Robbins’ techniques a 8/10 at the end of my week of experimenting with the High 5 Morning for building confidence and making me feel closer to myself. Once I recognized I was making an investment in myself and my confidence, the several steps didn’t seem overwhelming, tedious, or foolish. It all boils down to how I feel about myself and how supportive I am of myself. 

PSA: We shouldn’t wait to feel more self-assured until we earn a promotion, can squeeze into our favorite pair of high school jeans, or hear a long-awaited response from a crush. We should be content right now. So, go ahead and high-five your strong, confident, and content self to gain the self-assurance you so well deserve.